Chapter 9 Heart Fluttering

“Mu Jiejie.” Xie Yi lowered his eyes, looking at her lowered fingertips, and called softly.

“What’s wrong?” Su Mu snapped out of her thoughts about the ill-fated relationship with Yan Jiyue.

Xie Yi raised his exquisitely curved chin. The misty water vapor of Jiangnan and the dreamy sunlight made his already clean and fair complexion appear even more delicate and transparent. He pointed to the bright red blood marks on his face: “Continue.”

“…Alright.” Su Mu scooped a bit of medicine from the bottle and continued to apply it to his wound.

But looking at the gaping wound on his face, Su Mu’s feelings of guilt surged up again. Yan Jiyue’s personality had always been domineering and arrogant. If it was him before the rebirth, it would have been fine, but now Yan Jiyue had also been reborn and still maintained a strong hatred towards Xie Yi.

Su Mu suddenly didn’t dare to keep Xie Yi by her side. Who knows if Yan Jiyue would suddenly do something underhanded to Xie Yi?

After all, in her previous life, Yan Jiyue had done such things many times.

Fortunately, every time she had seen through it and caught him in the act.

And Su Mu had also reached her limit in her constant yielding to Yan Jiyue. She had moved out of the Yan mansion with Xie Yi. On the surface, they were still husband and wife, but in reality, they were already separated.

“Xie Yi, do you miss home?” Su Mu asked tentatively.

Xie Yi’s eyes trembled slightly. Yes, how could he not miss it?

Even though his parents in the desert had been killed and his younger brother had married and disappeared, he had after all grown up in the desert, accustomed to the lonely smoke and setting sun, the fierce wind and yellow sand.

Even though everyone said Jiangnan was good, Jiangnan had only brought him endless pain and humiliation. If it weren’t for Su Mu, he wouldn’t know where he’d have drifted to now, living a life worse than pigs and dogs.

But he couldn’t answer directly like this. Maybe this was Su Mu’s test?

Even raising a dog requires testing its loyalty. If it’s a good dog that can’t be driven away, naturally the owner will trust it more.

But if the dog really shows signs of wanting to leave, what awaits it is at best a severe beating, at worst being sold to a dog meat vendor.

A chill spread in his heart, but his eyes revealed utter innocence and dependence: “I don’t want to. I like Mu Jiejie, I want to be with Mu Jiejie.”

Acting, he was best at it.

He thought he could successfully deceive Su Mu, showing his loyalty to her in passing, gaining her trust.

But unexpectedly, when Su Mu saw the dependence in his eyes, she shook her head slightly.

Not only was she not happy with his initiative to show goodwill, but she said seriously and gently: “I know you don’t like it here. Shall I send you home?”

Xie Yi raised his eyes in surprise, too stunned to speak.

“Go back to the desert, go find your family.” In the previous life, Xie Yi had told Su Mu that he still had a younger brother alive.

She endured the debt and affection of two lifetimes, and rubbed his soft, fluffy long hair, as if petting a large furry animal.

Her abilities were limited now, and as long as Xie Yi stayed by her side, there would always be danger. It would be better to send him back to his hometown to live a peaceful life.

Perhaps in the previous life, Xie Yi had developed romantic feelings for her after following her for ten years, but the current Xie Yi had only been with her for a few days. He couldn’t possibly have such deep dependence on her, let alone give up the chance to go home because of her.

She knew he was pretending, but she wasn’t angry. This was just Xie Yi’s way of protecting himself. Everyone has difficulties in life where they have to compromise.

Su Mu knew she could never go back home, and she didn’t want Xie Yi to be like her.

She had always treated Xie Yi as a younger brother, until she saw Xie Yi die for her, only then did a hint of different emotion arise in her heart. But that slight amorous feeling was nothing compared to Xie Yi’s safety.

Xie Yi returning to his hometown would also change his tragic end of dying by poison. This was the best ending for him.

Thinking of this, Su Mu took out all the money she had been saving. It wasn’t much, but it was several dozen taels of silver, enough for travel expenses along the way.

She placed the money in Xie Yi’s hand and said to him: “I know there will be a merchant caravan passing through Juan City to the desert in half a month. You can go with them then.”

Xie Yi couldn’t believe his ears. Su Mu’s voice was so gentle it could drip water. Her deep green eyes reflected his image at this moment. A thousand emotions seemed to surge in Xie Yi’s chest in an instant, falling wet on his heart, soaking him inside and out, impossible to wring dry.

Why would she let him leave so easily?

To buy him, she had spent 20 taels of silver.

Yet she had done nothing to him, and instead gave him delicious candy. If that was all, it would have been fine, but now she gave him several dozen taels of silver and told him to return to the desert.

Why?

Xie Yi’s mind suddenly became a mess, inexplicably surging with a kind of anxiety.

A moment ago, he was still calculating how to seduce Su Mu, to make her fall in love, willingly give him money, so he could take the money and escape back to the desert.

But the next moment, with the heavy silver in his hand, it felt like a heavy dark cloud hanging over his head, gloomy and gray. As his long-missed homeland beckoned to him, he found he could no longer generate any joy or happiness in his heart. Instead, a feeling of reluctance grew.

Reluctance?

Xie Yi sneered in his heart. Reluctant about what? Reluctant to leave the needle-sharp minds and viper-like vicious hearts of Jiangnan men? Did he think the brand on his chest wasn’t deep enough?

But… Xie Yi lowered his head, looking at Su Mu’s skirt hem soaked by puddles, showing a decadent deep red color after being soaked in water.

He dared not look into Su Mu’s eyes, dared not directly face the smile in her eyes. If there was any reluctance, it was only for one person, Su Mu.

“Then it’s settled.” Su Mu’s voice, filled with a smile, came from above his head.

It was only at this moment that Xie Yi fully believed that Su Mu was not testing him. She truly wanted to let him go.

Perhaps from the moment she brought him home and tore up the slave contract in front of him, she already had this intention.

She had emptied all her savings to rescue him from the hands of an evil master, personally removed the collar from his neck, and set him free.

Yet from beginning to end, he had been maliciously speculating about her. Xie Yi buried his head even lower, his heart feeling as if it had been harshly burned by smoke.

Xie Yi didn’t consider himself a good person, but at this moment he realized from the bottom of his heart that applying those dark thoughts he had before to Su Mu was a desecration of her.

Xie Yi returned to his room in a daze and lay down, because after applying the medicine, Su Mu had told him to rest well.

Even though she had clearly decided to send him away, Su Mu was still so kind to him, so kind it made him feel guilty, made him feel unworthy.

It started raining again outside. The rain in Jiangnan seemed to never stop. The cold, damp air crept into his flesh and bones, the long-accumulated moisture in his body making his heart feel almost moldy.

Xie Yi tossed and turned on the bed, the low eaves and the sound of rain annoying him more and more.

The bright silver was placed by his pillow, but now he found it an eyesore. He suddenly sat up, pushed away the silver he had previously longed for but now found irritating, and picked up the small bag beside it.

The bag contained the honey-coated seeds Su Mu had bought for him. Xie Yi took one and put it in his mouth, and his restless heart finally found some relief.

Would he still be able to eat honey-coated seeds after returning to the desert?

Xie Yi’s heart, which had just found relief, suddenly felt empty again.

The round, orange honey-coated seed was like the setting sun in the desert. Such a magnificent scene appeared in Xie Yi’s dreams every night, but now as he recalled it, he found its radiance had dimmed, far less attractive than the honey-coated seed in his hand.

There was a faint sound from outside. Xie Yi got up and opened the window to look out.

In the misty rain, Su Mu entered the kitchen, seemingly preparing to cook.

Xie Yi ran out in the rain: “Mu Jiejie, let me do it.”

Xie Yi was panicking inside. He had already received so much kindness from Su Mu. Xie Yi, who had always been thick-skinned and enjoyed women’s preferential treatment of him due to his beauty, for the first time sincerely wanted to show his worth in front of Su Mu.

After all… after all, he was going to leave anyway.

Before leaving, he should be nice to Su Mu, even nicer. Or maybe cause some trouble for Su Mu, make her dislike him, scold him. Make him forget her goodness, only remember her bad side.

Otherwise, when he returned to the desert, he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to stop thinking about her often.

“No need.” Su Mu smiled as she tied on her apron, revealing her snow-white arms. In the misty rain, her snow-like skin was like priceless ice jade.

Xie Yi’s breath caught, and a blush spread across his face.

Su Mu skillfully washed the rice, cut two pieces of sweet potato and put them into the pot, then expertly started the fire. The whole process was smooth and flowing. Though it was an action full of fireside atmosphere, in her hands it seemed like casting a spell.

“Do you like the candy I gave you?” Su Mu asked as she stood by the stove. Her thick, beautiful hair was tied up with a hairpin, with a few strands of black hair falling by her temples. The warm orange firelight shone on her ice-like transparent skin, as if it would melt the next moment.

Xie Yi’s eyes avoided her gaze, not daring to directly look at Su Mu’s gentle and dazzling radiance. He lowered his eyes and nodded: “I like it.”

The honey-coated seeds actually tasted very ordinary, and the sweetness was cloying, but for some reason, he just liked them. He liked to take one out and eat it when he had nothing to do, as if addicted.

“I’m glad you like them.” Su Mu lowered her head and smiled: “Although honey-coated seeds are very cheap and common candy in Juan City, you can’t get them in the desert. Tomorrow I’ll buy more for you to eat on the way.”

Xie Yi remained silent, but he tightly grasped the candy in his hand, his knuckles turning blue and white, the honey-coated seed in his palm cracking.

Why was she so kind to him?

“The food is ready.” Su Mu stood up and lifted the pot lid. A burst of steam came out, condensing on her fair arms.

Xie Yi quietly looked at her tall, jade-like figure. Such a good person, yet without a single good person around her, having to cook for herself.

She didn’t even have a man to serve and warm her bed. If he left, would she truly become all alone?

Xie Yi was suddenly startled by the thought in his mind of imagining himself as Su Mu’s man.

He touched his cheeks, forcibly suppressing the blush that had risen.

A woman like Su Mu, after divorcing, must have lots of men begging to marry her. Why was he anxious to find someone for her?

“Let me.” Xie Yi stood up and took the bowl from Su Mu’s hands, his fingertips inadvertently touching her knuckles.

Xie Yi felt as if his heart had trembled, his dark green eyes in turmoil.