Chapter 64: Despair

In a room of the inn, Si Qingyu curled up her knees and leaned against the headboard, her face unusually calm under the dim candlelight.

She stared intently at the flickering candlelight on the table with a peaceful gaze.

This was the first time she and Shaoxuan had been apart since their marriage. In the past, at this time of night, the man would still be curled up on her body, acting coquettishly. Even though he was a noble and elegant young master, he loved to act coquettishly, and he did it so naturally that it made people feel pity and love for him.

She had never thought that his other side would be like this…

Sigh, Si Qingyu let out a sigh, raised her head, covered her eyes with one hand, and rubbed them hard. She half-opened her eyes and looked at the carved bed canopy in a daze.

Where should she go next? She thought it was time to leave the town for a while.

But… where could she go if she left the town?

Si Qingyu felt confused about these things for the first time. After Si’s mother passed away, she no longer had any concerns. At that time, she had never been at a loss about her future path. It didn’t matter where she went, as long as she had the ability to keep herself from starving, she could live her life however she wanted.

She had always felt that she would be alone in this life, but even so, she had never felt lonely because she was used to it. In fact, she used to enjoy and appreciate that kind of leisurely and carefree life.

However, after marrying Shaoxuan, she had a sense of belonging in her heart. She had thought it would continue like this.

Why had things turned out this way?

She had known Luo Shaoxuan for nearly three years, but it seemed that she had never truly understood him. Perhaps all she had seen was only his good side.

Si Qingyu tightly hugged her knees with both arms, her eyes appearing even more confused in the dark night.

The next day, Si Qingyu rented a carriage in town, still planning to leave here first. Before leaving, she went to the clinic to inform Zhao Sixi.

As expected, when Zhao Sixi heard that she was leaving, she was extremely surprised and asked with an anxious and puzzled expression, “Why? Doctor Si, where are you going when everything is going well?”

Where to go? She didn’t know where she was going either.

Si Qingyu shook her head indifferently, “I don’t know yet.”

Zhao Sixi looked at Si Qingyu’s pale face carefully, knowing that something must have happened for Doctor Si to be like this. “Doctor Si, will you come back in the future?”

Si Qingyu remained silent for a moment and shook her head again. She didn’t know either, as her thoughts were quite chaotic now. She raised her hand and rubbed her brow wearily, “From now on, the clinic will be left to you to take care of. Remember to be more attentive and work harder.”

With that said, she reached out and patted the girl’s shoulder encouragingly.

Zhao Sixi’s mouth curved downward, and she started crying directly, “Doctor Si, what on earth happened to you? Are you not coming back?”

Saying such words made it seem like she would never return in the future.

Si Qingyu was directly amused by her appearance, and a smile finally appeared on her pale lips. She touched the girl’s hair with a smile, “I’m fine, I’m just leaving for a while. A girl like you can’t casually shed tears. If someone sees you, they might laugh at you.”

“Let them laugh if they want.” Zhao Sixi rubbed her tearful eyes with a crying tone and looked at her aggrievedly, “Doctor Si, you must come back soon. I’ll help you take care of the clinic for now.”

“Okay.” She nodded at her with a smile and then left.

When she reached the town entrance, she saw the carriage at the entrance from a distance, and the old lady even waved at her.

She was about to walk over, but out of the corner of her eye, she caught a glimpse of a purple figure behind a tree. Si Qingyu frowned, stopped in her tracks, turned a corner, and walked towards a less crowded area farther from the town entrance before stopping.

She stopped not far from the edge of the tree and spoke coldly, “Come out, I know you’re following me.”

Following her so obviously, wasn’t it just to let her see?

The man standing behind the tree trunk shrank back, hesitated for a moment, then tiptoed out. His eyes were red, as if he had just shed tears, and there was still a watery glint in his eyes as he looked at her timidly, then lowered his head again, his fingers nervously tugging at his sleeves.

That cautious appearance of wanting to approach her but not daring to step forward due to fear and uncertainty made Si Qingyu’s eyes instantly turn sour.

Si Qingyu turned her face away, not looking at him, her hands tightly clenched under her sleeves, her brows and eyes indifferent, “Don’t follow me.”

Luo Shaoxuan’s heart ached, and he raised his eyes to look at her with a sorrowful gaze, “Do you really want to treat me like this? Do you really want to abandon me?”

She had clearly promised that she would never abandon him, and she had treated him so well just a few days ago.

He loved her so much and couldn’t leave her. How could she treat him like this and abandon him just for the sake of those damn people?

Luo Shaoxuan’s lowered eyes became even more sinister and creepy, and a rampant feeling rose in his heart. He wanted to eliminate everything that was an eyesore except for the two of them. It would be good if only the two of them were left. Then she would only have him and wouldn’t think of abandoning him.

Si Qingyu was completely unaware of the man’s dark mentality. She only heard the man’s miserable words, which almost softened her heart. She spoke in a slightly hoarse voice, “I said, when you know where you went wrong, come and find me.”

Luo Shaoxuan’s eyes lost their darkness, and he raised his eyes to gaze at her affectionately, pursing his lips and saying in a low voice, “I know I was wrong…”

He admitted his mistake in this way, but there was not a trace of remorse in his eyes or words.

Si Qingyu finally looked at him, staring intently at his face, not missing the slightest change. Luo Shaoxuan felt a little guilty under her gaze, and his beautiful eyes unconsciously shifted to the side, not daring to meet her gaze.

“Then…” Si Qingyu looked at him indifferently, her lips slightly curling, “Where do you think you went wrong?”

Where did he go wrong? He never thought he was wrong. But being asked by her like this, Luo Shaoxuan slightly furrowed his delicate brows and looked at her expression, tentatively saying, “I shouldn’t have killed people? No, I shouldn’t have let Qingpo go and kill people…” He even emphasized the last sentence to let her know that it wasn’t actually him who killed those people. Most of the time, it was Qingpo who followed orders and took action. He thought she would find it easier to accept this way.

But that was just his thought. Whether he personally took action or instructed Qingpo to do it, there was no difference between the two.

Sometimes Si Qingyu felt that he was like a child in front of her, both in thoughts and actions. She had always thought it was because he was too dependent on her.

Seeing his unrepentant appearance, a sense of desolation increased in her heart, “Let me ask you, why did you kill that young entertainer? And that Niu Lao Er?”

The man fell silent again, lowering his head without speaking.

Si Qingyu stood there quietly, patiently waiting for his answer.

Finally, after a long silence in the air, the man spoke softly, “Because…” He raised his head to look at her. At this moment, his appearance was no longer as coquettish and affectionate as it had been in front of her before. His black eyes were as deep and unfathomable as an abyss, cold and terrifying, “Because he coveted you.” Luo Shaoxuan’s red lips curved into a cruel and bloodthirsty smile, “You are mine alone. Anyone who dares to covet you deserves to die!”

He emphasized that she belonged to him word by word.

“…” Si Qingyu was truly frightened by his terrifying appearance. She unconsciously took a step back, afraid that the man would pounce on her and devour her in the next moment.

Her retreating movement and pale face startled Luo Shaoxuan. He waved his hands in panic, “Ziliang, don’t be afraid. I… I would never hurt you!”

“Enough!” Si Qingyu’s chest heaved slightly, and she looked at him with unsteady breathing, stopping the man’s attempt to approach her. She no longer had any softness in her heart, “I think we have nothing more to say.”

She didn’t know that his possessiveness had become so terrifyingly strong.

Not wanting to hear his excuses anymore, she had nothing more to say to him. She looked at him indifferently for a moment and finally sighed, “If fate allows, we’ll meet again.” With that said, she turned and left.

Luo Shaoxuan clenched his fists tightly, staring at the woman’s heartless back with a crimson gaze. He strode forward, grabbed her wrist from behind, and forcefully pulled her back, his eyes coldly fixed on her indifferent face, “If you dare to leave, I will slaughter everyone in this town.”

He was threatening her, taking advantage of her kindness and mercy to threaten her.

How despicable…

Si Qingyu’s heart was filled with desolation. A surge of sourness and bitterness rushed to her eyes. She stared at him fixedly as a tear slid down from the corner of her eye, dripping onto the man’s wrist.

Luo Shaoxuan’s hand withdrew abruptly as if it had been scalded. The cold and bloodthirsty expression on his face vanished. He looked at the woman’s tearful face in a fluster, and tears also seeped from his beautiful eyes. He cried while frantically wiping her tears, “Don’t cry… Please don’t cry…” He hugged her tightly in his arms and choked, “I won’t kill them, I won’t… So… Don’t cry…”

This was more painful than killing him.

Si Qingyu pushed him away, turned her back, took a deep breath, and spoke with a hoarse voice, “If you dare to indiscriminately kill the innocent again, don’t ever expect to see me again.” She tried to ignore the suppressed crying behind her and left, enduring the sore feeling in her eyes.

Luo Shaoxuan, who was behind her, saw that the woman was really leaving and was about to follow with red eyes, but was stopped by the woman’s cold voice.

“If you dare to follow again, don’t blame me for heartlessly giving you a divorce letter.”

Indeed, the man seemed to have heard the most terrifying thing in the world. His body trembled, and he stood still, not daring to take half a step forward. His beautiful eyes just blankly watched the woman’s figure get on the carriage, and finally, the carriage disappeared completely from his sight.

Don’t go…

A rush of melancholy surged from his dantian to his heart. Luo Shaoxuan only felt an extremely heavy taste of blood in his throat. He covered his mouth with trembling hands, and blood flowed from the corner of his mouth. His whole body seemed to have lost strength and softly collapsed. His eyes were weakly half-open, and in a daze, he seemed to see a woman in white walking urgently to him. The light in his eyes slowly dissipated, and finally, he fell into complete darkness.

Si Qingyu sat in the carriage, her eyes dull as she looked out the window.

The old lady driving the carriage looked back at her and said softly, “Doctor Si, did you have a fight with your husband at home?” She had seen her and a man seemingly arguing from a distance, but it was too far, and she hadn’t seen the man’s face clearly.

Si Qingyu shook her head lightly and didn’t respond.

The old lady was more certain that she had a fight with her husband. She sighed, “Doctor Si, don’t be so sad. Actually, as long as you coax them more, they won’t make a fuss. When two people live together, there will always be more or less some quarrels. Men need to be cherished and coaxed. Give him more care, be more accommodating to him, and coax him, and it will be fine.”

Si Qingyu smiled at her faintly with pale lips, “Thank you, auntie. I’m fine.”

“Ah, it’s good if you’re fine. Anyway, since we have to live our lives, why not live happily? Don’t you agree?”

“Mm.” Si Qingyu responded indifferently, her thoughts drifting far away.